Secret Diary of a Sex Worker's Assistant
You see their jaw drop as you give them an honest answer to the question, “So, what do you do?”
Sex Worker Personal Assistant.
What the hell is that?
It’s a good question. What image does the job title conjure up for you? A high-heeled intern dashing through the bustling city, coffee order in one hand and a bag of lube in the other? A slave in a gimp suit performing the role of footstool for a Dominatrix? An unwashed tech whiz in a dark room, headphones on, locked into the laptop screen, editing a video and reformatting a website at the same time?
In reality, it’s a little bit of everything. An assistant to a sex worker can provide whatever services they have in their portfolio that will enable the sex worker to do their job in the easiest, most enjoyable way. I can’t say that I know of many people offering these kinds of services in an official capacity. A few Google searches flagged up one other website that I could find, where a former sex worker was offering assistance and advice from their experience. Of course, many sex workers have assistants in an informal capacity. The partner holding the camera as you try out your new toy, the friend tracking your location who calls five minutes into an outcall to make sure you’re safe. But these people have their own lives, and you often find yourself in a situation where you need help and you can’t get it.
Being a sex worker is hard graft. There is no denying it. There is a jokey phrase thrown around on the Internet when someone is struggling with their studies or job that they might just pack it in and make an OnlyFans. It implies that it’s the easy way out, when that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sex work is work. Yes, it’s the “oldest job in the world” and “sex sells”, but that doesn’t mean it’s a quick cash fix. More often than not, a sex worker has to be their own business. They are the CEO, actor, director, caterer, editor, marketer, supplier, accountant, social media team and cleaner. They have to make themself into a brand, and they rarely have a day off. How many of us can say that we have all of those skills under our belt, and could pull them off to a high enough standard to sustain a business?
That’s where I come in. I take on some of those roles to alleviate the pressure and allow them to focus on the parts of the business they enjoy. This could be as a one-off gig where I compress and organise their video archives, or an ongoing partnership where I write up promotional tweets. Whatever a sex worker is looking for support with, I can come onboard and we can figure out the best way that I can assist them to improve their work-life balance, their profits or their business in general. I have met so many wonderful people through this job and learnt so much about an industry that permeates every corner of our culture and yet is considered taboo. If you are a consumer, I encourage you to consider sourcing your content ethically and directly supporting creators. If you are a sex worker, get in touch and we can see how I can support your business.